Metal Warriors – A Retro “Review”

I was going to just post links to this game’s soundtrack which is cleary the God of Prog’s gift to the SNES, but I’ll only post two in this otherwise short Retro “Review”, “Preparing for Battle” first and then “Vital Mission” at the end.

When I went to mod my SNES Classic Edition I scoured the console’s sub-reddit for titles I’d never heard of that popped up on more than a few lists of “must add” games, and this was one of them. A side-scrolling shoot-em up in which you control a giant red mech suit and take the fight to Axis, an evil empire and its dastardly troops. There are 9 levels, an amazing soundtrack, and some wonderful animations. Seriously, some of the best SNES animation I’ve ever seen in a game.

Here’s why this is a great title and a worthy addition to any SNES collection, however you may collect games:
-There are multiple suits of armor you can find and commandeer throughout the game, sometimes as a mission requirement, other times you’ll just find them. They all play differently and have their uses, none feel awful.
-As mentioned, the soundtrack is killer.
-Each level has a specific mission, the majority of which is to simply get to the right side of the screen and kill enemies along the way. But when this deviates, it does so with such spectacle. You’ll blast your way into and hijack an enemy ship, sneak into an enemy base and steal a prototype flying mech, you’ll do battle with three large mech worms digging their way through a wrecked city, and more. Each level feels special and no level ever gets boring.
-The game is difficult but fair. If you died, you generally could have done more to prevent it. There are some instances where this isn’t the case, with too many bullets and too many enemies, but there are usually ways to circumvent these situations.
-The bosses are a treat and a visual wonder, most of the time, even if the final boss is a touch too easy.

Have an SNES Classic? Mod it, get this. Is this on Virtual Console? Get it. Have a real SNES? Find it in a used game store. You’ll thank me.

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Added January 30, 2018
Removed quotations around the game’s name in the post title because I’m a pedantic ass sometimes.

Mega Man X 3 – A Retro “Review”

So I skipped X2 in my reviews and I’m sorry about that, I really am. But I just wrapped up X3 last night and had a few things to say about it.

Mostly, it’s the hardest Mega Man game I’ve ever touched.

I’m no slouch. I’ve finished more than a handful of games in this series, a few of the Soulsborne titles, and countless other “difficult” games over the years. When I say I struggled with the stupid Blast Hornet robot for nearly 20 deaths, I want to stress that this dude gave me more cause for pause than Orphan of Kos at the end of The Old Hunters Bloodborne DLC. And don’t get me started on Kaiser Sigma. That guy can eff right off. One weak point, only weak against standard Buster blasts? And it’s a tiny spot? Surrounded by invulnerable “Battle Body” armor? BS. I hate that dude. Also, dying in the lava escape sequence makes you fight all the boss fights again? Man, Miyazaki got the Sister Friede fight from this game, didn’t he?

The levels are super short, the hidden bosses (Bit, Byte and Vile) are all fairly simple and, once you figure out the correct order of bosses and what powers to use, they become laughable. I never used Zero, though I suppose I should have given him a shot, and I didn’t sacrifice him to give X his sword. Mainly because I didn’t know you could do that.

Did I enjoy this game? Yeah, the music was tight, the visuals continue to improve over the previous X titles, and the controls are as tight as ever. Even if some bosses were easy, mastering their patterns and learning their weaknesses was still a hoot. And even though Kaiser Sigma was a real pain in my rump, finally toppling him was a triumphant moment.

Overall? A worthy game for a worthy series, hard as it may be.

Book

This is a great book. Funny, insightful, and engaging, as well as educational and a nice visual curiosity.

It covers what happens with both an automated translation program and a neural network translate a text and its awesome.

Buy it.

press start to translate: This is what happens when you let a computer translate a video game?

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Added January 22, 2017
Modified the title of the post so it wasn’t in all lower-case because I’m sometimes overly pedantic.

Status Update: 1/16/18

Zak Bartels is in town this Thursday, then we’re going to KC to see Distant Worlds which is a long time coming.

After that? We’ll watch Scott Pilgrim and maybe Blade Runner 2049, I dunno.

I’m currently rewatching Venture Brothers and every Monday, Flix Brewhouse is showing a different Miyazaki film throughout January. We saw Princess Mononoke and last night Aubrey and I saw Howl’s Moving Castle. Next week? Totoro, and then finally Spirited Away with her and our friends Brandon and Josh.

I also got this Bloodborne board game for xmas so, you know, I need to figure that out at some point.

Finished Dark Souls 3 + DLC, ran through the Dishonored 2 expansion (the bank heist is the best level in the series and possibly one of the best in gaming, period) and now I’m on to 2017’s Prey which is holding my interest thus far. It’s a great spiritual successor to System Shock 2 but I wouldn’t mind it if that third SS game came out sooner rather than later. SHODAN is greatly missed.

Still loving my job.
Still loving Des Moines.
Still hating snow.

Life is good.

Also:

Predictions for Top 5 games of 2018:

#1-5:
DARK SOULS 1 REMASTER ON SWITCH, BAAAAABYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Top 5 Games of 2017

Just gonna keep it short and sweet, here are my top 5 games from 2017. Side note: These are games that I played for the first time in 2017. Hence the inclusion of a game or two on this list appearing, despite coming out a year or so earlier. And no replays, otherwise FFT would win. Anyhow, here we go:

5: Shovel Knight

I know, I know, I’m coming to this game a bit late, but said wait was worth it. Playing this religiously during every free second that I had during a week-long vacation was, sadly, one of the best parts of the vacation. The colors, the nostalgic side-scrolling, the fluid controls, and the unique and charming boss battles were all fantastic.

The Switch port came with the two DLC expansions available at the time and they both added context to parts of the story, new gameplay mechanics that feel uniquely their own, and extended the life of the game, as a whole. Get this one, folks.

4: Dark Souls 3

I can’t believe I’m finally into these games and I owe it all to an annoying friend that demanded I play Bloodborne (a vastly superior game). I finished the base game right before the start of 2018 and am currently working through the DLC because I’m a glutton for punishment. The world, the combat, the invasions, the struggle, and the rolling are all worth the price of admission. Try But Hole, indeed.
Visually? Stunning. The music? Excellent. The boss and enemy design? Disgusting, haunting, and a joy to see. The feeling you get upon toppling one you’ve fought 38 times so far (Pontiff, you cad)? Priceless.

3: Life is Strange

I know, I know, three of these games didn’t come out in 2017, but goddamn it did these all topple any of those other games. What, was I going to give the win to Mass Effect: Andromeda, with its clunky mechanics and lackluster plot? Or Final Fantasy XV with its open and boring world and lackluster plot? Or any of the other games with gameplay issues and lackluster plots? No, I’m giving a spot to a story driven game with emotional weight, an interesting and consistently appealing art style, a simple set of engaging gameplay mechanics, and a story that I still think about, often.
I have yet to play the prequel and, honestly, I’m nervous to do so in fear that it will tarnish or dilute my opinion of the prime game. I don’t want that to ever happen. Again, as I said in my review, this game won’t make it on my Top 10 list or probably in a Top 50, but as far as games I played in 2017? Few managed to stick as much as this.

2:Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild

#1 is Mario Odyssey. It was a tough call but in the end I had to decide which had more impact in a long-term style, and the truth is, Breath of the Wild would win only if I allowed the initial punch of first starting the game to cloud my overall judgement. Having said that, there is way too much to say about this game in a simple year-end recap so I’ll just stick to my main points:
-The game is huge and beautiful
-Climbing is a joy and gliding is just as impressive
-Bosses are challenging if not repetitive and sparse
-If you don’t like the music, screw you
-There is more charm in this open world than almost all the Elder Scrolls combined
I have sort of started the latest DLC but the controls don’t mesh with Dark Souls’ so I’m wrapping that up, first. I was going back and forth between the two games but constantly downing Estus like an idiot during invasions due to button mapping confusion. This will not do.

1:Mario Odyssey

For as much fun as Zelda was on the Switch, if this Mario game had come out first? There’d be no stopping the sale of the console. There are a few games in every console’s lifetime that are pure magic and charm. This is already one of the Switch’s and its unfair that it came so early in the cycle. I have nothing major to add here that you haven’t seen in a billion other reviews, so I won’t dwell. Just know that I go back to this game for a few moons every few days and, even though I’ve toppled the game’s larger (and, arguably largest) challenges, the soaring majesty and accomplishment of this title will have me recommending people buy the console itself just for this one game. A must play, a must own, a must experience.

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Come back some other time for a movie list, or something. I dunno. Happy New Year and welcome to 2018!
-Skyler

 

PS: Best game I played in 2017, period, was still Rocket League you fools.