bartelsc – batman

every christmas i watch batman returns. it is a christmas movie. if you don’t believe me you are a fool.

this was the wrost christmas in my entire life.

i have never, ever, felt this alone before.

in the immortal words of fry:
“time makes fools of us all”

i wish i was batman.

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Added March 22, 2016
With Aubrey gone, this was the worst Christmas I’d ever experienced. Of this there is no debate.

I really DO watch Batman Returns every year. No joke. Started the tradition about five years ago with my brothers, stuck ever since.

bartelsc – Callier/Arnaert

When nothing is left
There’s nothing to lose.

When there’s nothing to lose
There is peace of the mind.

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Added March 22, 2016
I miss the sound these guys used to have, back when they were good. Just tried to re-listen to “In Wonderland”, the newest album, today. Key work is “tried”

bartelsc – Albarn

Arrhythmia

Accepting that you live with uncertainty

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Added March 22, 2016
That album is fucking fantastic.

bartelsc – i keep on making the same mistakes

a dirty little habit i can do without

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Added March 22, 2016
you look really good in your beanbag chair

bartelsc – wilson

a body has washed up on a northford beach
he was a friend
that i could not reach

and i may
just waste away
from doing nothing

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Added March 22, 2016

bartelsc – a pit

my grandmother died this morning and i have no place to put all the energy and emotion. because she abandonded me and left behind nothing.

i just throw stuff in this pit, now, and it seems bottomless. but i will worry with each new bit of myself i toss in there, that it will overflow.

everything is pain.

i’m so overdramatic.

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Added March 22, 2016
Hard to believe my last grandparent died over a year ago. Rest in peace, old people.

bartelsc – two truths and a lie

1.) once when i was a child i dressed in my sister’s clothing and pranced about my room pretending i’d had a sex change and was now a woman. and by child i mean it… i was probably around 12 or so years old. i have never had a deep rooted feeling of sexual confusion. aside from that one moment.

2.) yesterday afternoon while watching movies with my brother and laughing, i released myself, silently and privately, from the shackles of regret and internal torment. i’m now single and i’m accepting of this as fact.

3.) if i could go to any one place on earth without fear it would be egypt.

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Added March 21, 2016
Oh man. Not clearing this one up today. Oh, no. Too much at stake for that.

bartelsc – no one owes you, no ones to blame

save for bad genes

and DNA

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Added March 21, 2016
See you, Space Cowboy